image source; nouba @ The Atrium
So we’re a little under nine months away from the big day – wedding day, that is – and I’m already beginning to have nervous nightmares. From playlists which were never created, to a curious lack of any discernible menu, to rain pouring so hard that even the bravest of brides wouldn’t consider setting foot out the door.
Okay, so my nightmares may seem a little dramatic, and aside from the rain, have little likelihood of happening; my propensity to plan down to the very last detail will see to that. But, there’s still that niggly feeling in the back of my head that something, anything, will go wrong.
The last time I had these kinds of nightmares – and such disrupted sleep – was when me and one of my best girlfriends spent over five weeks away, travelling around the US and for me, Canada too. I’m the type who has trouble relinquishing control over anything, with the added pressure of aspiring to the perfect… anything really. It’s little surprise I grew up (mostly) as an only child; and even my own actions as an adult are riddled with the neuroses that seem bound with growing up on your own.
I’ve taken on much, or arguably all, of the wedding planning (and possibly a honeymoon…?), in addition to planning out our upcoming trip to Italy and the US in July (which has me excited just at the thought!), so to say that I’ve got a lot on my plate right now is probably an understatement. So with this year shaping up to be bigger than the last few, I thought I’d use the opportunity to make this space a little more personal, something that has been lacking, as of late (along with the flurry of outfit posts!).
As someone who never seems to get a grasp on when too much is enough, I’m welcoming any advice from those who are, or have been in the same boat. Strength in numbers, and sharing those little pearls of wisdom, and all that…
I had the same worries about our wedding. In the end, it was perfect. Everything went to plan. We stopped the music for speeches and forgot to put it back on until after desert (oops) … But I’m not sure anyone noticed or cared. I think once you’ve chosen and booked everything you just have to trust that it will work out on the day. As for personal posts – I think it’s really a matter for you how personal you want to get, but I wouldn’t mind a couple more snaps of those fur babies of yours hahah
That is such a beautiful photo 🙂
We got engaged in December and have only just begun the planning process! It’s so exciting, but this week it’s really started to dawn on me how stressful it could actually turn out to be! I really want to enjoy the process, so I’m just trying to realise that not everything has to be “pinterest perfect” for it to be an amazing day!
I’d love to hear a bit more about how your wedding planning is going and if you have any tips for someone just starting out!
– and I hope you don’t have too many more nightmares!!
Lauren xx
Yea, I definitely get nervous about things like that. When I travel especially. But the friend I travel with now is a crazy organizer too so I just let her worry about things. I just worry until takeoff and once we’re there I can breathe, haha.
Italy is going to be next on my trip list! (after NZ/Australia which should be this year)
http://www.closet-fashionista.com/
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Haha that’s handy! What dates are you planning on being in Australia? xx
I was married almost five years ago, and I’m normally an anxious, worrying mess. My priority for my wedding day was to be relaxed, and my top pieces of advice I always tell people: 1) delegate, delegate, delegate. You can still plan/design, but hand over the execution to someone else – or at least invite people to help (stuffing invites, making favors or whatever). And let people contribute, utilize friends/family with different skills/specialties (i found them easier to trust than complete strangers too). I had a vision for what I wanted my day to look like, put together a mood board and then turned over the reigns to my mom and her interior decorator friend. My grandma is a baker and made our cake. My in-laws throw parties regularly so I let them handle the logistics of rentals and caterer. A good friend of ours is a photographer so she did our photos (we still paid everyone of course). 2) Prioritize. Pick 3-5 things that are absolutely essential/important/necessary to you and focus on those things going right or “perfect” and let everything else unfold as they will. 3) The most important thing about your wedding day? That you are married by the end of it. Everything else could fall apart (one of our ring bearers chickened out, my bridesmaid got bronchitis the day before, a bunch of our guests cancelled that weekend due to a flu bug going around, a groomsman forgot what we rehearsed and walked down the aisle alone and then ran back to get the bridesmaid he was paired with) but as long as you complete your vows and end the night with your love – then it was a success.
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Thank you so much for the advice! I’ve already got on board one of my girlfriends, and have another that I’m planning to ask.
I guess I just have to keep in mind that just because something goes wrong, doesn’t mean it is the end of the world!! I love the idea of focusing on 3-5 things – will be doing that come wedding day! x
Hire a wedding planner?
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Not in my budget unfortunately!
I too never know when too much is enough. I am a mother of two young babies, I work full time for an intense retailer as a general manager and I am just about to launch my new business (called the Realigned – I would LOVE to send you one of our peices. Have a look at us @TheRealigned on Insta)
Before all of this life change I was still the girl with huge drive, it seemed nothing at all to have a huge list of things to organise and achieve.
Somehow when it came to planning our wedding (I was living in London at the time) and co-ordinate the wedding and honeymoon, as well as accomodation for the international guests, felt completely overwhelmed. For me it was about having everything come together so seamlessly on this one day so that our family and friends of 4 different cultures (Australian, Greek, Latin and British) had a great time.
It was at about 6 months that I started to panic…as it turns out – for no reason at all. I realised (on the day) that the pressure existed only in my imagination.
So … My point is… You are a busy woman, you have 1 million things in the go at any one time. This is like those other times.. It will all be perfect. Just give it the time it deserves to make the right decision. Don’t rethink decisions.. I am sure you have a timeline (which allows for scoping suppliers, taste testing food etc) make sure there is enough time built into this process. Make decisions only when you must. Use the other time to visualise how it’s all coming together. I am sure you are doing all this right now.
I love your blog and so happy to see that you will be adding a more personal touch to it this year. I look forward to reading about your journey ahead.
Warmest regards,
Mara
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Hi Mara, thanks for your comment. SO exciting about your launch – do feel free to email me on xjaime@gmail.com as I’d love to hear more.
God that sounds like a lot of pressure – I feel a little fortunate that our wedding is a three hour flight for most people and not too far from the city.
I’ve started to write in my diary little things to check off each week so that I don’t feel the pressure so much of doing everything at once – I think it’s helping, a little!
Anyway, thank you so much for leaving a comment xx
I had my first wedding nightmare last night. We seem to have similar planning styles, I have to have control of everything or I will stress out more! Good luck with the planning x
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Yikes what happened? Yeah I like to know that everything is going to end up like the vision in my head, and it’s a little unnerving knowing that I’m going to have to task certain things to people on the day, but I guess that’s what being a good delegator is for, right? When’s your wedding? xx