I recently spent months coveting a pair of shoes, only to finally bite the bullet and find that they were too narrow for me. The shoes were expensive, so naturally I had been keeping an eagle eye out for a flash sale or discount (I use Carted to track price drops BTW – game changing!). Being from Khaite, the brand is largely inaccessible here in Australia, so often you’re relying on reviews and imagery you’ve found online to fill in the whole picture.
Trying these beautiful Khaite sandals on in my home, I immediately found myself coming up with justifications to keep them. To ignore their narrowness in spite of reason.
But the reality is, that if I had hung on to them, the sheer discomfort from the sides of my foot hanging over the edge would be enough for me to never reach for them. I’d be conscious of this mere fact, too. One of those nuanced details that can be difficult to judge online from a product photograph or a model shot.
This is the kind of thing I would have done in my twenties. Come up with excuses for the “item”, rather than accepting that it’s not me that’s the problem. While it fits all my other criteria, there are certain non-negotiable that just aren’t worth budging on.
For example, my rule to never buy synthetic blend knitwear from Sezane. I’ve learnt my lesson in the past – it’s never washed well for me (wool wash setting, even handwashing) and there’s always this synthetic feel to the touch of the fabric that I can’t look past. Instead, I’ll only buy a sweater from the brand if it’s 100% natural fibres. I’ve made exceptions in the past and it’s been an immediate return as I can sense from the get go that it doesn’t meet my personal requirements and standard for what I want to add into my closet (a solid reminder that what I’m after, and what you’re after might be very different!).
Going back to the sandals… On paper, they were everything I’d been looking for. A chic minimalist design, rather dainty little straps, walkable low sturdy heel, in an easy-going slip on style. The quality is exceptional – everything I would expect from a luxury shoe. But what I hadn’t anticipated was just how narrowly cut they would be. The overhang on both sides was considerable (enough that even my husband immediately noticed); a common problem I run into when trying to buy “dainty” sandals as someone with wide feet.
Despite entertaining keeping these for a couple of minutes, it was an easy “no” for me. The price point made these a high risk piece – they had to fall into the Goldilocks category of just right for me to seriously consider adding them to my closet.
One thing this highlights is just how important the actual “try-on” is. Discovering what does and equally does not work for you is largely trial and error. It’s why your perception of quality changes as you get older and have had access to a larger variety of brands over the years. How you feel out your personal style; the ways you like to wear items, colours you gravitate to (and ones you avoid), the silhouettes you choose.
Sometimes, the trial and error part is not on you and your preferences, but on the way an item is cut – one of those little details that can be tricky to judge on first glance. One thing this has reminded me is how useful it can be to check out the item – or a similar piece if it’s not readily available – ahead of time, so you can rule it out earlier rather than later.
When you settle on something that is so-so, you’re adding an item into the mix that isn’t going to make you feel your best. And when you add in too many of these things to your wardrobe, you can start to feel unhappy in your outfits because the expectation doesn’t meet reality, or feel like if you just buy “one more thing” it’ll solve the problems you’re having with putting together outfits.
Be fussy with what you add into your closet, and it’ll pay you dividends in feeling good in what you wear.
